Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Cross Walks

Unless you have lived in a really shitty third world country for the last 150 years you may not have encountered this fabulous new technology called CROSSWALKS. Crosswalks control the flow of traffic for both pedestrians and vehicles alike and unless you are a moron, crosswalks will ensure that you are not struck by any vehicles in motion. The first crosswalks were introduced in England in 1868. Unfortunately they caused major delays because of the time schedule and thus they were removed for another 50 years. Since that time, crosswalks have been placed at every single intersection in America (I think). Now what this means to you is probably nothing, but if you live in Tallahassee (or various other cities with a high population of blind folk) like me, you might be sightly annoyed by the fact that our crosswalks chirp. Blind people need to get across the street and I am completely for that, but making the crosswalks chirp at 168 decibels is completely unnecessary. I have trouble sleeping at night because the only noise I hear all night is the goddamn crosswalk across the street. Now, I find it utterly ridiculous for Crosswalks to chirp on a timer, if you need the noise, push the button. But when it goes off every 8 minutes, it becomes a little disconcerting to say the least. Here is what I had to say about this "crosswalk problem" at The Comedy Zone Tallahassee...

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